Yoda USB Desk Protector

"Cubicle of the Fittest" will offer gizmos, toys, decor and more — to help local cubicites stay alive or at least have a good laugh within the stifling, neon lit, tastelessly decorated walls of their cubes.

Looking at this week's item is Daniel Pendick with Geeked on Goddard in Prince George's County, Md.

"In a decision between working in a windowless cubicle or driving a light saber through my head, it would be a tough choice. But certainly it would be easier to bear if the Force were with me," Pendick said.

This week's addition to your office survival kit is:

The Yoda USB Desk Protector

"Guard your desk, he will," states ThinkGeek, which is offering this week's selection.

If you need to step outside your partitioned walls to seek the caffeine necessary to sustain your cubed existence, Yoda will have your back.

Plug him into any available USB port — and when office intruders slink in, Yoda will fire up his lightsaber and warn them to back off.

His motion sensor will detect movement between 6 and 9 feet away.

Mightier than the lightsaber, though, are the words he will stun invaders with. The Jedi Master will have them fleeing in no time as he hurls out six vintage "Star Wars" phrases, including:

• "A disturbance in the Force there is."

• "Still much to learn you have"

• "So certain of defeat are you, hmmm?"

In the fight against your present office reality, Yoda is one warrior you may want on your side as you brace yourself for more recycled air to come.

As for Pendick's opinion, he beckons Yoda to "Come to the Dark Side at Geeked On Goddard, and together we shall rule the blogosphere!"

Give Yoda a Rest

While you're sitting at your desk, you can keep Yoda in silent mode. As ThinkGeek points out, "You can only take so much Jedi Master before you go insane, after all..."

You can also turn his motion detector off when you want to give him a rest altogether.

The running ThinkGeek price for Yoda — $25.99. Hearing Yoda tell your PHB, "In the end, cowards are those who follow the Dark Side" — priceless.

If he could only say, "Do or do not. There is no try," that might raise our dignity out of the partitioned swamp it has sunk into.

ThinkGeek offers further details on the Yoda USB desk protector.

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Patch makes no claims about the performance of nor does it endorse the reviewed item.